I want to be there for you, and for my friends , and for my family. But I can only be in one place at a time. Choice is forced on us by the laws of physics.
For it to matter, it must be material. For it to be important, it must have intention. So instead of carrying the disappointment from not being where I can not be. I carry my whole self into the presence of being wherever I am.
The universe becomes my ally and not my enemy. My agency is revealed by my choice of surrender. It is far more difficult to bend the whole universe than it is to simply bend yourself.
It is not righteousness I seek, but alignment. Pride fills my body from the experience of being exactly who I need to be for others simply by being who need to be for myself.